Malingering ISIS Forge Sick Notes So Don’t Have To Fight

This is hilarious. In this piece from The Young Turks, Ana Kasparian and Brett Erlich from Pop Trigger discuss a report from the American army’s West Point Combatting Terrorism Centre that Daesh is now having serious problems retaining staff. Coalition airstrikes have taken their toll, and the zealous ghazis for al-Baghdadi are having to make cutbacks. They’ve been told not to use so much electricity, and that they can no longer use official vehicles for personal use. They’ve also had to take a pay cut of 50%. As a result, some of the fighters are obtaining dodgy doctor’s notes saying that they’re too sick to fight in the front line.

Kasparian and Erlich note that, although there is this image of ISIS fighters as mature, ruthless men, some of them are only in their 20s, and others are just children. They’ve grown up with ISIS. Some of them may even have joined because they have no choice if they are to survive and make a living after the terrorists captured their part of Iraq or Syria. Some are alienated, but for others they probably joined it because it was the only game in town.

And now that it’s no longer paying, they’re forging sick notes to get out of it. Kasparian points out that the consequences for being obtaining such a fraudulent is probably beheading, if they get found out.

Erlich states that he a bit cautious about it, because it sounds like some of the propaganda they release about Americans being so opposed to their government, that they’re forging sick notes to get out of working for it. He also says that it’s close to an episode of Family Guy, where Osama bin Laden is shown haranguing one of his troopers, who has presented a sick note so he doesn’t have to go on a suicide bombing. Bin Laden states that this isn’t a valid reason for not going, as it’s a suicide mission, and so the bomber’s health really isn’t a factor.

This too much like all the stories about school kids forging sick notes from their mothers, so they don’t have to do school sports or PE. You can just imagine it: Dear Emir, please could you let Ahmed off the zealous murder, torture and rape of infidels, and people who just looked at you funny in the street today, as he has a cold/tummy ache/verucca (strike out which doesn’t apply). Yours faithfully, his mum/dad/Dr MadeupName.

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