Shocking figures reveal 99% of government ministers unable to toss a pancake

Pride's Purge


Official figures newly released reveal the vast majority of government cabinet ministers are unable to successfully toss a pancake – with some attempts by senior members of the coalition government ending up hitting the ceiling, landing on the floor or on nearby family members and pets thanks to their poor tossing technique.

The shocking statistics – which were obtained only after a Freedom of Information request – show not even one Conservative or Liberal Democrat cabinet figure able to successfully keep a pancake in the pan while tossing it and a majority of junior government ministers either very poor or below average at flipping a crepe.

Experts expressed surprise at the scandalous figures as most had expected at least one minister – Vince Cable –  to be able to avoid folding one over mid-toss. However, the FOI request revealed Dr Cable is just as much of a useless tosser as all the…

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4 Responses to “Shocking figures reveal 99% of government ministers unable to toss a pancake”

  1. joanna Says:

    Well that’s a shocker, because we all know they are a bunch of Tossers, and that isn’t satire!!!

    • beastrabban Says:

      No, it isn’t. Perhaps someone ought to start writing jokes to the effect that it’s amazing how Cameron and the cabinet are able to write, due to the repetitive strain injury in their right hands.

  2. joanna Says:

    Nice one you have made me smile, thank you!

    It’s clear they aren’t lefties, because the ones I know have intelligence and a heart in various degrees, Camoron and co have neither!!! in Any degree!!!

  3. joanna Says:

    If they have RSI it aint from tossing pancakes! Can you think of anyone who would wanna to sleep with any of them apart from their deluded spouses!?!

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